for the previously marginalized social group
in the mass market
tired of being alone,
my mother said,
“aren’t you getting tired of being alone?”
warm bodies can warm a bed better than hot bricks -
conserve your coal, she said.
tonight i bring a blanket of my own,
not to add a semblance of my self to your private dwelling
but because these sheets release our heat with abandon
without calculating maximum surface area we press up against each other
hands grasping backs and shoulders,
thighs clipping thighs into agreeable submission
(no squirming in our sleep)
toes tucked beneath knees -
i’m still kinda chilly.
but I like being held and spoken to, softly.
pillowtalk, increasingly intimate
help me to forget i’m somehow still freezing
while painting soft pictures of the things your soul screams for, silently.
generous with your own heat
it’s not hard to believe friends have furnished your home with kindness
but i am surprised that we sleep on an ex-girlfriends’ old blankets –
these fallen leaves: fertile grounds for new love.
On 05/29/13 9:59 AM, Steve Kennelly wrote:
I got it!! Only a million years late, but who’s counting.
I think you’re a funny writer/person, tho my opinion shouldn’t matter, right?
The following is apropos of today’s meeting:
“I mean, to some extent it’s really hard to KNOW what’s going to come next in life,
but I really don’t want to be so blind or unprepared or unwilling to recognize
what’s coming next.”
Funny how these things swirl around us and don’t go away until we make them.
Well now that I’ve responded, I’m forgiven?
See you next week.
PS Don’t turn my hall lights off anymore.
What are you some kindda Tarot Card reader or something!!
[tongue in cheek]
On 04/21/11 11:31 AM, Caitlin Reid wrote:
I’m sorry it’s taken so long to get back to you. These past few weeks have been particularly busy, but I’ve thought about writing you for a while. I’ll start by saying that I am well! I’m still studying at MICA in Baltimore. Recently I was researching a NJ student film contest and I watched one of the winning videos from last year, and it happened to have been produced by a Princeton undergraduate! It was a pretty cool video, but it was particularly fascinating to me because they filmed a lot of it in the quad which reminded me of when I used to venture that way in the springtime of last year.
My first year in college has been pretty challenging, but I’m feeling more like a REAL adult, responsible person. which makes me happy! I mean, for the most part. I was cast in two short films being produced by students and I joined MICAppella (the a cappella group here) and that’s kept me busy/content/excited. I decided that I’m going to study Interdisciplinary Sculpture and concentrate in Video Arts. I had an AMAZINGLY fabulous Video I teacher, Stephanie, who’s super knowledgeable and gesticulates wildly when she speaks and is just all around passionate about her art and living. Also, she’s a woman, which in and of itself was really encouraging because for whatever reason the field is mostly dominated by men (to further put it in perspective, 90-95% of the people majoring in Film & Video at MICA are men…).
Second semester I started a job at Urban Outfitters, a clothing store in the Inner Harbor, a twelve minute bike-ride from my school. I definitely liked being able to make money and support my existence in college because it wasn’t until the last month that my Dad was able to get a job (he was out of one since last fall or summer). However, it sort of woke me up to what being OUT of college might be like: really fucking scary. Seriously! Most of the people who worked there were mid-twenties, just out of college or not going to college, trying to get by on minimum wage or working two jobs just to avoid moving back in with their parents. Which isn’t a terrible thing, but after living on your own for a while it’s probably ideal to try and stay independent.
At the same time, after a friend’s recommendation I started experimenting with a youth-oriented online dating site. Not necessarily with the intent to “meet” people, but to chat with them and get strangers to call me pretty. Kind of. Well, after three or four days I was thoroughly exhausted with this site and decided to delete my account because I had lost all hope on meeting the love of my life. However, one guy who I was chatting with and had exchanged emails with continued talking with me after I deleted it. He’s a musician and software developer in Reston, West Virginia and commutes to D.C. for his job. We had a series of conversations about our mutual interest in music-making, but also about how he dislikes his creativity-ridden job.
Meditating on potential routes for apres-college has really affected me. I’ve also started talking to seniors at MICA about what they’re doing after college, but really none of them seem to have a set plan. This was even more upsetting to me. I mean, to some extent it’s really hard to know what’s going to come next in life, but I really don’t want to be so blind or unprepared or unwilling to recognizes what’s coming next. As far as the part time job went as a whole, I determined that 1. I hate folding clothes for 8 hours straight, 2. I love making art, 3. doing anything beside something creative or helpful to another person (or yourself) is in a lot of ways, time wasted. That last one was a little melodramatic but you know what I mean.
On another note, I got a job as a Residential Advisor (RA) for next year! I’m really happy about that because I get free room + board and make a $1000 stipend per year as well. Which is pretty nice money! This year my parents gave me a monthly allowance for art supplies and getting set up with my life but I don’t think that they’re going to do that anymore.
Overall I’m thinking that I want to study Fibers, Performance and Video within the Interdisciplinary sculpture major, but after that I might go do something “academic” like be a psychologist or be a writer. I really like making movies, because as we talked about last year, I like the combination of audio and visual medium, performance and writing all in one production.
How is your life going? How’s is New Jersey and springtime, your wonderful kids and family? 
November 25, 2013 – Comments
 “meet” – disambiguation unclear
 Michael was, and continues to be, employed as a software engineer for a government weapons & warfare agency.
 “to know” as it implies clairvoyance? Or having your eyes up long enough to see past these immediate circumstances?
 air-quotes clearly connoting some insecurity around this prospect; academia, anathema to creative work? – now i know: they’re intricately linked.
 is being a writer necessarily an “academic” profession? I wouldn’t say so.
 This is a letter to my therapist.
i asked to hear the Whole Story not anticipating any tears
i was told of anxious ultimatums
48-hours to choose a union, their futures
a paradigm prompting redacted decisions
(perhaps skewed by those unnecessary deadlines)
(a limit, perhaps, conceived of, like:
if you really loved me, deciding wouldn’t take any time at all~~)
frantic and hazy, seems like this girl tried to test you –
when love takes time
and forgiveness takes practice.
but maybe i ain’t learned.
i could only think of children on playgrounds chasing one another
young lips: light beams, cootie machines, and language loopers
virgins proposing ringed union on flimsy string-cheese knees
imitating movies? perhaps, but even then
we desired signals of strength,
a rush of blood to the groin –
not forgetting what we never knew about, namely,
our Emerging Adulthood-Selves, or
the Future: this place where poor choices hang like
a lead albatross, crossed three time around our necks
and we limp long beyond the lesson’s length.